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Title: Not Your Baby-Girl
Author: Anita, anita_fiction@yahoo.com
Rated: K | Format: Short Story (1/1)
Summary:
BoA is a pop idol that is madly in love with KangTa, the hottest guy in
Korea, but everyone only sees her like a Baby-Girl. Can she change it?
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I was doing an all-nighter at the studio. There were too many albums and too many concerts, so I didn't have much time to practice some old songs I had to know.
Every week my manager used to do that, put me on the studio and make me sing all of my old albums tracks. At first, I used to have fun doing it. It's always funny to be up all night doing good things like singing. But it turned into routine, an obligation, and no teen likes obligation.
"That's okay now, you can take some time to relax, BoA. You look tired…." he told me.
Did I say I became the greatest actress for that? Tiredness is my specialty. But I can pretend a cold, and there's fever….
When he would let me relax, I wandered down SM corridors. It was so romantic…. They were lonely, empty, inspiring. I think many of our best composers used them as inspiration…. Yes, for sure.
But it wasn't making me any good that day…. I was the one feeling alone.
'Gosh, I'm lost….'I realized. I was probably far from where I usually go. 'Yeah, lost…. No good. He's gonna kill me!'
I was desperately trying to return to the studio where I had been practicing before, but I had forgotten its name…. Forgotten, for Pete's sake, I think I've never really paid attention to that vital little detail.
It was when I heard voices.
'I hope they are not ghosts'
I started looking for their origin, when I saw a studio with its door opened. A good sign, after all, ghosts don't need to open doors.
"Yes, that will be it," a girly voice said.
"So… Are we on for tomorrow?" a guy's voice asked.
"I think so".
"That will be just great!"
I didn't know the girl, but the man…. Yes I knew him!
I ran to the door and saw it.
They were kissing.
'This is definitely not my day….' I thought, as I saw them breaking the kiss and realize my presence. The girl blushed, picked up some papers and went past me.
But the guy…. Well the guy just kept on looking at me. He was taller and had a messy hair. Plus he was one of the hottest guys in Korea at that moment.
"Hey B-girl, what are you doing here? I thought your studio was on the other side of the building," he said.
I was paralyzed.
"Are you feeling well?" he started moving closer to me and put a hand on my forehead. "You're okay…. That's great!"
He smiled. Yes, KangTa was the one there, in front of me, smiling at me, worried about me. That would have been a great time to fake a fever. I'm a fool!
"What are you doing here? Isn't your manager looking for you?" he asked using a sarcastic tone. Everyone made jokes about the overprotection of my manager towards me.
I never thought it was funny, but then…. Well, he didn't want anyone to laugh. And if he did, the only one there was me. He wanted to please me!
As it's perfectly clear: I love KangTa. Me and all Korean girls… And some guys… and some Japanese girls… Man, that was a hard competition.
I laughed, trying to be pleasant.
"He told me to relax a bit…." I finally answered.
"Okay. But what are you doing here? Never seen you around…."
"It's that…" I hesitated a little, feeling that I was a fool, "I'm lost."
What else would I do? Tell him that I was okay and see him another dozen times, while walking in circles? No. I had to do that. Besides, it wasn't like I would never see KangTa again, right?
"Lost, are we?" he repeated more to himself… "That's what happens when you walk alone in places you don't know. Why didn't you call your manager to pick you up?"
Did I say I was feeling a fool right now? Well, let me update that. I was a complete fool.
"Because… Ummm… I don't know," I told him truthfully.
"Okay, B-girl, want a phone?"
'No I was kinda hoping you would walk me there.' How I wanted to tell him that!
"Why not?" I answered.
I dialed my manager's cell phone, but it was luckily off. Not my day!!!
"Not on," I told him, hanging up the phone.
"Then… In which studio were you?
"Dunno. Never noticed that… I'm so sorry".
Dummy! Silly! Idiot!
"Why don't you wait for him to pick you up then? He knows there aren't a lot of studios working overnight today".
"Yeah… I will."
"I'll make you some coffee!"
"No coffee, I don't like it".
"Hot chocolate?"
"Yes!"
And there we sat. Drinking and in silence. Any girl would love to be me at the moment. For sure, they would! But I couldn't find anything to talk about.
KangTa wasn't an easy man to figure out. He was hot, and the girls were always all over him. But he didn't go out with many…. He was always working. He sang, composed and wrote songs; he had even produced an album of mine. But he was charming and talkative, not like the other geniuses around here.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Midday. Downtown, Seoul.
"How was your big adventure yesterday, Bo?", my manager asked me, while reading a newspaper.
"Don't call me that…". I looked up at him. "Hey, it's not hygienic to read while waiting for lunch!"
"You were the one who wanted to eat this early, not me".
"It's that you got me working all night and all morning".
"You ran away".
"I got lost!"
"Yeah, how am I supposed to believe that you got lost and saved by your super singing hero?"
"Shut up!"
"This isn't a lady's manner".
"And if you go on like that, you won't be this lady's manager".
Food came and I was grateful. I hated when he started talking about KangTa. I mean, he had hatred in his tone… Maybe it was jealousy. But…
He has almost told KangTa about my true feelings!
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Flashbacks:
Little BoA attending to a special party. Bad manager with her. Both with KangTa and friends. Little BoA blushed. Bad manager laughing. KangTa worried. Bad manager explaining: "It's your effect on women". Little BoA digging a hole.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Why did I confide in such a man? Well, as a matter of fact, I didn't. He just found it out for himself… And when I tell him not to say that to KangTa he always looks at me as if saying: "He doesn't know?"
Of course he doesn't! I hide it pretty well, how would he?
As I said, he didn't use to go out with a lot of women. Yeah, well… The other night was an exception, to tell the truth I almost never see him with a woman. But, again, the other night I saw. It was the second time, and it made me mad.
Both were mature and beautiful. Was that his type?
"Hey, isn't that super singing hero?" my manager asked, folding the paper. "I'm gonna talk to him, haven't thanked him for rescuing little princess here."
He got up before I could protest. He's never said anything good to KangTa. I took a look at where he was going; at least he didn't make me tag along.
'Oh, gosh! It's that girl'. I covered my face. It was about this lunch they were talking.
Any girl would feel lucky to choose the same restaurant as their idol for lunch, but not when he had company. And there was my manager, again, making a fool of me.
I took another quick glance at the table, maybe he wasn't…
Wrong. He and KangTa were looking at my table and laughing hard. I was so red, so red… It was unfair! KangTa would always think of me as a child, a spoiled brat.
And there was the gorgeous woman right next to him. I knew she was the same as the one from the other night… That time she had had her hair tied, maybe for she was working. Now it was free and beautifully curled. Like a Cinderella; she looked even prettier.
'And blond, she's not Korean, just like the other girl from last year. Maybe he likes westerners'.
At least her eyes seemed to be brown… I just had to dye my hair… Yeah, my new look would be that one. Blond BoA with curled hair. I could write a song saying that now I'm Cinderella.
"Hey, it's not polite to ignore friends", someone said and I almost fainted.
I looked right up to KangTa, who was smiling next to me and playing with my hair.
"So? Don't you owe me an apology?" he kept on playing with it, curling it… Oh well, it would help my hairdresser.
"I didn't want to annoy your girl".
"Mandy? She's a fan of yours! She was just asking me to come here and greet you when your Papa arrived".
"A fan? She's not even Korean…"
"Can't westerners be your fans?"
"Of course they can…"
"You're famous worldwide".
"So are you…"
"Why are you like this?"
"She's jealous", my manager answered. Yeah, one more time he did it. "I told you more than once, you have this effect on women".
"Hahahaha! Let me call Mandy, you'll talk to her, right?" And he winked.
How could I resist that? How *would* I?
And we ended up eating together… It was hard to see Mandy all over KangTa, though it was funny, because, in the beginning, she was all over me.
"You're really BoA!? How lucky I am to meet you here!!! I came to Korea to help SM Town and I never thought of meeting you in person. I mean… You must be really busy".
As she babbled about me, KangTa seemed unease; maybe he was thinking: "There goes my perfect date".
"I know I'd be working with KangTa, but I've never thought of the possibility we would actually date, haha! Least of all meet BoA during it!"
"You see, she adores you," he said, smiling weakly.
"Yeah, Bo, you're not the only jealous one…" "Papa" told me.
One day I would fire him, with pleasure!
"Don't ever call me that again!" I told him, "And I'm not jealous, who would and of whom?!"
"I don't get it…" Mandy said, for I said in Korean and she didn't speak it so fluently.
"That's just he teasing B-girl, hehehe," KangTa said.
I blushed a little… Mandy was calm and cute. I was explosive, how would I compete with that?
He had his arms on her shoulder and they made a really cute couple.
"So… Are you two for real?" I asked, hesitantly.
"Oh, not really, Mandy is going back to the States tomorrow".
"I think that's why he chose me… No strings attached", she answered bitterly.
"Yeah… maybe. It's hard to keep a relationship when you're a public person. B-girl knows what I'm talking about. We're in the same business and hardly meet. How would I have a normal girlfriend if I can't even meet a friend?"
I blushed harder. He said "a friend", right? He considered me that high?
"Well, then let's seize the day and have fun!" and she got up, "I'm done with the meal".
"You're right, bye bye, fellas!"
I stayed there. Shocked. I was a friend to him. Friends can be together at any time, so I could call him and be with him and…
"Where are they going to, anyway?" I asked.
"Grown ups' business, Bo".
There went my happiness… I didn't even have energy to talk back about not calling me Bo.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Time passed by and, without our noticing, it was summer. It used to be a busy time in SM corridors. People going from room to room to check things out. Many of them were on vacation so many had to be in their place. For me, one of the singers, it was horrible. I had to talk to different people doing things they were not used to, and I had to stand my manager complaints about them.
Plus, it was more frequent for me to meet KangTa.
Why wasn't it good? Simple; I always met him with my dearest manager and everyone can guess the result.
"So, I was thinking about a trip," one of our directors said.
A trip? Of course the major part agreed instantly.
"Which kind of trip, of course not only Bo but a lot of people have their own business other than the Summer Vacation Album," my manager said.
Why was I the only one there with the manager? I was growing up; I could take care of my business too!
My own business, I mean, not his!
"It would be for a weekend, then we would shoot the video. Before that we've got to record the song. Hee Jun, is it ready?"
"Yes, kind of… KangTa is finishing it up, I think it's fine".
"For sure it is!" KangTa answered promptly, "I'll be done by tomorrow".
"Great! Then we'll hand you the lyrics and you train them. We'll be able to record it in one or two days. While you do that, I'll be trying and finding a good place for us to shoot the video". The director looked at my manager. "And of course that won't take too long, no worries".
"But learning period is two days!? Are crazy, man!?" one of the singers complained.
"It's not like you've never done it before".
"Bo can do it, you just have lend her the lyrics and all… She's kinda used to that thing", the real crazy man, I mean, my beloved manager commented. I wonder if he was bragging about me or about himself.
The meeting was not a success, but what had to be discussed was. The day after I received the song and a sample, for me to have an idea of how I would to sing it.
It was so beautiful… The tune and all. I just love KangTa's songs. My love… Oh well, only mine. The good thing about that girl was that she would disappear and he would never hear from her again. The bad thing was that at that moment, I was sure he didn't want anything serious.
It was too troublesome for him, a superstar. And if he should change his mind he would come look for me… I was sure he wasn't the type of man who wanted a big baby. That's how everyone called me: Baby Girl.
It was okay if it was in Japan. But when it got to Korea… There was always KangTa to hear it. I wonder if he's B-Girl actually mean Baby Girl.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
"We're here," manager said, pointing to a beautiful resort.
It was near a village and it was luxurious. At least SM Town still had that glamor… Although these vacation albums were boring to do.
We had already recorded. It would be three songs, for each artist to have more time to perform. I got the last group. I didn't really know how the song got for I had to fly to Japan right away. Actually I would meet my partners right there without knowing their identities.
But I heard KangTa was in the first group, so well… I had no hopes at all.
"So, whom will I be shooting with?" I asked, taking a look around. We had taken the plane to a nearby city and driven for three hours. It sure was a secluded place.
"I don't know. It would be with FlytotheSky but it looks like Hwan Hee got problems with his voice… So they put Brian in another group and the other here. But it could even be a girl".
"It'll be a duo!?"
"Seems so".
"Bad manager! You know nothing at all…"
"It's that both would record yesterday and it all happened then. So they did it all through the night. It must be KangTa or Moon Hee Jun… They would be the ones who'd know the song best".
"KangTa!? Really!?"
Yeah, I had a really big smile on my face, which faded when I made eye contact with Hee Jun.
"Not happy to see me, BoA?" he asked, making me blush.
"Not it. She thought she would shoot with KangTa", a needless-to-name man said.
"Nope… He's in the first group and they had done it all already".
"Oh…" I said and blushed again, "It doesn't mean I don't like shooting with you, Hee Jun! It's just that I…"
"…Was disappointed not to see the love of her life here", my manager pleasingly completed.
"Then make a smiling face, 'cause you know I love it!" he said, smiling himself, "He's actually here with the director. They are thinking of the possibility of having the two of us doing this song with you".
"Really!? No kidding!? Hee Jun, I love you!"
"Yeah, I know; and don't worry. Your secret rush is safe with me!"
"Safer, you mean…" I said, using my eyes to look for my dearest Kangta.
"What do you mean, Bo?" Bull's eye.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
KangTa didn't sing. Neither could I talk to him. Of course it was pretty good working with him again. So great! He's a genius… I think I fell in love with all over again.
And yes, I was wrong about Hee Jun. My secret wasn't safer with him… Actually, for being KangTa's friend, he put me through a lot of embarrassing situations. Just like someone all of you know… maybe kind of worse.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Flashbacks:
Little BoA and Mean Hee Jun shooting. KangTa checking things out with the director. Little BoA laughing and blushing. KangTa looking at Little BoA: "Are the lights making you feel sick or anything, B-Girl?" Little BoA happy for the nickname. Mean Hee Jun: "She was just wondering if you wanna change places with me…" Little BoA digging another hole.
Little BoA sitting by the pool waiting for her time to shoot. Mean Hee Jun coming from behind. Little BoA "accidentally" falling into the pool. Mean Hee Jun calling for KangTa: "Hey, she wants some swim lessons, KangTa! What about mouth-to-mouth!?" KangTa pretending not to know either of them. Little BoA wishing she could drown and dig a hole once again.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Anyway, the video was done pretty quickly and the day after, in the afternoon, we had some time to rest before the car came to pick us up.
"Me too!?" I asked my bad manager.
"Yeah… I think your Prince Charming did a really good job for no one expected it to be done like that".
"I looooove you, Bad Manager!!!"
"Maybe she loves everybody…" Hee Jun arrived with KangTa. Of course I blushed. "Who haven't you told that yet, BoA?"
"I don't really know…" telling the truth, "It's that I say it when people make me happy".
"Maybe KangTa never made you happy…" Hee Jun commented, "Or has she told that to you too?"
"Nope, not once", he said with a captivating smile, "Anyway, we came to steal you from your manager… There's a pool here so we were wondering if you'd like to swim with us".
"There may be a lot of people… I'm kinda shy, sorry". As true as it might have been, besides timidity, I really didn't want to go to pool, wearing bikinis, with KangTa. Least of all with "Mean" Hee Jun.
"Go, Bo. I have to work on some contracts and all… I wouldn't be able to take care of you anyway. I'll feel better if you're not at your own. After all, you're still a little girl. Take good care of her and we'll meet by the cars".
And Bad manager left me with "Mean" Hee Jun and KangTa…
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
"Where's Hee Jun…?" I finally had the guts to ask. It had been almost an hour since he was nowhere to be seen.
We were in the pool and as it was already late in the afternoon, few people were around.
"He went with a girl… Who knows where!" KangTa smiled warmly at me. "Have you been avoiding me lately? I mean… I really must be the only person you've never said I love you… I mean, with whom you're never open and cheerful and… Well, spontaneous".
"Don't ask me to act like a kid", I replied, hurt by his inquire.
"That's not it at all…" He swam, taking me with him to a corner of the almost deserted pool. "It's just that I wish I could see you act more like you act with Hee Jun. I really care about you BoA".
"I don't act different with Hee Jun… But you act different with me. More than you do with any other girl I've seen you with".
"It's that you're special to me".
He put his big hand on my face, as if drying water from it. It was so warm… It was a comfortable feeling that went from my stomach up to my throat, and back down again.
"More than Mandy is?" I silently asked.
"Mandy? Oh, the American girl? I didn't mean to say you're like a date or something… I just think of you as something precious".
My mind was a blur. What did he mean!?
"What do you think of me?" he continued.
"As a friend?"
"Friend…" I could sense disappointment in his tone. "Nothing more?"
Was he asking me if I actually liked him!?
I blushed really hard. How could he!? He had just said that I was not "dateable" and now asking that!?
"I… don't know where you're trying to get to. Please be more direct, KangTa. You're messing up with my mind, you know?"
"I'm sorry. It's that I don't really know how to say this… But… Well, there goes nothing. At first, to me, you were just a poor little girl who had been put into this dirty business and of whom they were trying to take advantage. Not wrong, was I? Anyway, when I got to produce that second album of yours, I started noticing how you were growing into a wonderful and funny and carefree young lady. So… Well I stopped having pity on you and started… Ummm… I got to like you more and more".
"You're trying to say that you like me more than a friend?"
"No… not exactly, B-Girl".
"Oh… By the way what does B-girl mean to you? Baby-Girl?"
"I haven't finished yet, you know…?"
"Sorry, I was just wondering", and of course, trying to avoid a deception. It was frustrating how he could build me a castle and then blow it all away.
"I don't really like you anymore. Yes, I do like your way. You're happy and look like a girl from comics or from a cartoon on television. But what I really feel for you can't, in any way, be called "to like". It's something warm, pleasant… Like what you can feel towards a friend or a relative. But it's more. Way more than that. It's… What I feel for you is definitely love, B-Girl".
He didn't wait for answer. But put my body against the tile of the pool, with his legs around my thighs, he prevented my body from running away. Not that after that confession it was really able to do something so active like that. Actually it was trembling.
And then, he kissed me ever so deeply.
My first kiss and all. It was strange how our bodies were together and how a sweet and tender breeze passed by. I felt goose bumps against that well-built superstar body… So sweet, so strong. So mine!
"By the way… Before we go and become the newest Korea's sweethearts, I think you might wanna know what the hell my "B-Girl", and not anybody's, I hope, means. It's "Beloved Girl". Cute, huh?"
"Shut up and kiss me one more time, who cares for that stupid and imminently fired manager of mine waiting for us to go back to Seoul!? From now on, I don't care if others see me as a kid. I'll be whatever you want me to. And you just be mine".
"It'll be my pleasure, my B-Girl".
The End!
Anita, 21/01/2004
Author's Note:
Wow!!! My first English fic ever!!! I mean finished English fic… hahahaha, oh well. And just for you to know, KangTa is miiine, I just lent him to BoA coz I hate having to be in a fic. Charas suffer too much; I'd rather be their owner. Even if they were not just charas.
In case anyone is wondering, Moon Hee Jun worked with KangTa during HOT and FlytotheSky is a cute R&B duo from SM Town. The manager BoA talks about is fictional, as one of hers recently died, I didn't even want to research names and all. These vacations are fictional and so the major part of data about the artists inside the fic. Though I tried to be as closer to reality as possible, I also tried not to make a real story that could become gossip.
As for this crazy author here… My nick is Anita and my e-mail, which will welcome yours, is anita_fiction@yahoo.com . Also, this fic was done for a new site (J-Spot) but will also try to be published in others. I always write about anime/manga and lately I've been trying artists and original fiction.
I would like to thank KangTa just for existing and, if he's reading this thing, I looooooooooove you!!! And also God, Mara (my English teacher) and my good friend Vane, who has been proofreading and cheering for this fic. Again, thanks to her!!!
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